Bloody Hell Chips radio spot

TEXT FROM OFFICER MIKE TO JOHN

Did you mean to send this to Father  Thomas? I forwarded it to him  for you. My 2 cents…we still look at women in church. Don’t worry so much.

TEXT TO OFFICER MIKE

Yes Father, I thought your sermon about Jesus being a dude who always has your back was good.  I must confess a crazy thought. When you told me not to sit behind Linda cause I’m looking at her butt and not thinking about the Mass. I thought you can’t spell Mass without…the last three letters. Sorries. Why weren’t my friends at Mass. One is Muslim, the one in New York is Jewish and Patty isn’t into any church…into being Swedish American. 8-0.

John thinks OMG, I sent that  text to Officer Mike. He knows all my business.

EMAIL FROM KEITH, CREATIVE DIRECTOR

Need a 60 sec  radio spot for Bloody Hell Chips. Aimed at 12-15 year old guys.   You can write it at home and send it to me. Time it for 50 sec or so. Have fun. This is big Johnny. But don’t worry you have a great man on your team. I graduated from Harvard and went on to get my creative feet wet in the film Masters program at UCLA.

12-15 year old boys are into… John types girls…jumping on each other…wrestling….grossing each other out…annoying adults…Bloody Hell Chips...very hot chips/crisps

TEXT FROM ADJIN

Hey, are we still on for going to the Pine Barrens and trying to scare hikers …throwing stones… knocking wood on trees…like we’re the Jersey Devil…communicating.

TEXT TO ADJIN

Yeah, but not to Canadian tourists…I like that they’re into green vacations and you know… the ecology in their environment so we can have all these birds migrating down here…who also fly up there.

John types:

Radio: 60 Sec

Client: Bloody Hell Chips

‘Farting Fire’

SFX: crickets sound

Guy1

‘Jersey Pine Barrens are creepy.’

Guy2

‘Makes me almost believe in the Jersey Devil’

SFX: Howl sound

Guy1

‘Look.  Here it comes. Quick. Eat some Bloody Hell Chips.’

Guy2

‘Wow Bloody Hell Chips are smoking hot’

Guy1

‘Here it comes. Turn around. Bend over.’

SFX: Torch blower sound

Guy1

‘Smoked Him’

NARRATOR (British?)

‘Bloody Hell Chips, you’ll fart fire.’

TEXT TO CREATIVE DIRECTOR KEITH

Here is the radio spot.  Bloody Hell Chips…you’ll  fart fire.’

Later-

TEXT FROM CREATIVE DIRECTOR KEITH TO JOHN

Did I mention I went to Harvard?  Anyway.  The Account team thinks it’s right and if it’s wrong…the client likes you so he won’t get angry. We sent it. I’ll let you know.  Farting fire….really dude?

TEXT FROM FATHER THOMAS TO JOHN

Ass in Mass. Really dude?  I expect you to train your mind and what’s it’s associating.

TEXT FROM PATTY TO JOHN

Really dude? You and Adjin are going to hide in the Pine Barrens and scare the hikers – like you are the Jersey Devil thumping on trees and throwing rocks?

John thinks. Three people just said ‘really dude?’ to me. What you do comes back to you in threes. Wicca.  I’m on freak’n Charmed.