So not a Viking warrior: A Celtic Cross on a smooth, hairless chest.

Patty, Ajdin and John looks up at the wooden pier as the three sit on the sand. Now, the pier seems like some ancient fortress with Ajdin's banshee at the gate.

From the wrestling, John's shirt is undone.

Ajdin

'What's with the undone shirt....with the fearsome cross, what is that again? Anyway, might wanna grow some hair on that chest...oh warrior.'

John

'It's a Celtic Cross. Actually meant to take away ancient superstitions and fears.'

Patty

'...along with their religion..'

John smiles

'...details...'

Patty

'...besides I like smooth chests.'

John leans on his elbows and says to Ajdin

'So there.'

John pulls his blonde hair.

'Besides, obviously I have Viking blood.'

Adjin

'Dude, I've so seen you surf. You couldn't raid across the community pool.'

John looks up at the Ajdin's banshee, screaming just off the Funtown Pier.

'That's a really cool effect Ajdin.'

Ajdin

'Don't try to change the subject by complimenting me. We're talking about your lack of warrior prowess.'

Patty

"Prowess? What are you writing down words from Katie Couric's broadcasts again?'

John to Patty

'Ajdin means enlightened one.'

Adjin

'Not working. Stop the compliments.'

From up on the pier.  Off-duty Bob-the-cop, in his street clothes

'Hey.'

Patty and John yell back.

'H-e-y'

Bob-the-cop

'I said hey.'

Patty to John

'And we said hey. Does he know when he's off duty he's...well duh, off duty.'

John

'Patty, please don't get him going.'

Patty to John

'Who me? I'm just a girl. Protect me Viking warrior.'

Patty screams up at the pier.

'H-e-y'

Bob-the-never-off-duty-cop

'Get up here. What's going on? Explain yourself.'

John to Patty

'I never explain anything. Mary Poppins.'

Patty laughing

'Seriously. You're quoting Mary Poppins oh fearsome, Viking/Celtic warrior?'

Ajdin yelling up to Bob

'Hey Bob. It's Ajdin. Thanks so much for checking on the boardwalk...keeping us safe. I'm creating a banshee for the Funtown pier. Look, what do you think?'

Bob

'Oh, I guess that's allowed.'

Patty to Ajdin

'...it's a clear violation of the Banshee code.'

Bob

'O.k. You guys aren't on anything are you? Intoxicated?'

Patty screams up to Bob

'Noo.'

Bob

'I guess it's o.k. Enjoy your Saturday night.'

John

'Great job in calming him down oh enlightened one.'

Adjin throws up two fingers in a peace sign.

'Muslims for peace.'

The banshee screams over the dark ocean and pier.

John

'...and for real. Bitch'n Banshee.'

Patty sarcastically.

'Literally bitch'n....yelling every five minutes  That'll n-e-v-e-r get old fast.'

Harry Houdini and the Boardwalk Demonologist.

John dives over the log bracing the pier. He lands with his face on the hooded attacker's butt. Patty is trying to kick herself from under him and now gets a good look at his face. The attacker whips out his phone and texts.

All of a sudden Patty starts laughing as John's phone vibrates that he has a text message. Still holding the attacker's legs, John leans the phone on the attacker's butt and reads:

Text from Adjin

'Get your head outta my butt.'

John let's go of the attacker's legs

Adjin flips over and smiles

John

'Seriously Adjin. You thought it was a good idea to scare...'

Adjin

'No, I thought it was a great idea. Since I was already down here working on the boardwalk demon thing for the summer.'

Patty is laughing and wiping the sand off her jeans as she gets up.

John

'What?'

Adjin

'Well, you know Seaside has to compete with Six Flags/Great Adventure. So I'm being hired to come up with some tricks. I'm the Harry Houdini of Seaside Heights.'

John

'More like the Houdini and ran. I have to admit, that banshee affect is really cool. I didn't see the light from the projector.'

Adjin, John and Patty walk from under the pier.

'Didn't say it uses a projector.'

Patty

'Come on Adjin, tell us.'

Adjin leans in to whisper in Patty's ear.

'No.'

Adjin laughs. Patty rolls her eyes and punches Adjin's shoulder.

John looking at the floating apparition.

'Something else for your resume...under skills I think.  Skills: Experienced in saying to amusement park riders: 'do you want to go faster?'  And now: Boardwalk Demonologist: your local terrorist.

Adjin shakes John's hand.

'Demonologist? Damned glad to meet you.'

The scream of the banshee, dead silence on the beach.

John

'Patty, hold up'

Patty has taken a wooden walkway between two 7 foot high dunes.

Patty

'Look, at that white thing off the pier. Doesn't it look like a person floating.'

John follows her onto the deserted beach.

John

'Yeah...that's floating...off the pier.'

Patty, come on. Patty walks fast down the beach. A mournful wail comes from the skeletal, closed- for- the- season boardwalk pier with it's empty rides.

John

'Jesus. Scream of the banshee.'

Patty smiling broadly

'Wouldn't that be cool.'

They near the empty Funtown pier and look up at a translucent female, figure, floating 18 feet high, just off the pier's end, over the ocean.

The wooden, utility pole pillars, look like a dead forest in the moonlight. Another banshee wail.

Patty points to the darkness, under the pier.

'It's coming from under there. Come on. Let's go.

John

'And I thought club Karma was scarey on a Saturday night.'

Patty leads. They can't see behind the thick pillars. She climbs over a log, used to brace the pier against the ocean. Looking to the beach, away from the ocean, the pillars look endless until the beach is right under the boardwalk. To the right, the stars shed little light on the black waves.

John

'Patty, slow down. Any wierdo could be under here.'

Patty is on the other side of a log brace from John. She turns and smiles.

Patty

'John honey. We're the wierdos. Who else is chasing banshees when they could be hooking up at Karma.'

Just then a hooded figure jumps out from the darkness and knocks Patty to the sand.

A ghostly figure on a new moon beach.

John crosses beach boulevard and stops to text.

Patty

'Who are you texting?'

John

'Ajdin. I'll bet he's working on something in the haunted mansion ride.'

Patty rolls her eyes.

John

'Well. Doesn't that wail sound amplified?'  'Ah, here. He texted back.'

John reads Ajdin's text.

'What?'

John texts Ajdin.

dude  didn't say i was havn sex. said sorry bout the text on sat nite butt where r u.

Ajdin's text

u said sex sorry butt tex   thought u wuz wita sorry-ass tex grl ;p

Patty is up on the boardwalk.

'John. There's a woman in white, floating just above the beach.'

The wind or the wail of the banshee.

Mary is looking at the lights on Park Avenue, New York City as she sips a well-aged scotch alone. The phone rings.

Mary

'Hi Bernie. Happy Saturday...'

Bernie

'I'm well-awre it's the weekend. I think it's time to shuffle the Account Executives offices.'

Mary

'Just a little panic...a little fear to keep them on their toes...like someone other than them is moving up.'

Bernie

'Exactly. Not the ones in the corner offices.'

Mary

'I know.'

Bernie

'Plan some thing out. And I'll see you Monday.'

Mary

'See you Monday. Bye.'

In Seaside Heights New Jersey, John steps off the porch into the darkness. Patty's face is beaming with a sense of adventure.

Patty

'Listen'

John looks towards the skeletal frame of the coasters and rides on the closed-for-the-season  Funtown pier.

John listens and hears this distorted wail coming from somewhere among the shadows.

John

'What is that?'

John gazes around at the empty gray streets and white sand dunes.

Patty laughs and begins to cross Ocean Boulevard. John glances back at the house with the Tiffany lamp in the window and lighted green shamrock in an upstairs windows.

John

'You know, once a mystery is solved...it's not much of anything. Like Peter Pan...the best part is before they get to Never, Neverland.'

Patty stands with her back to a six foot sand dune that anyone or anything could be hiding.

Another wail cries out from the empty boardwalk.

'Only one way to find out. Come on before he...or it leaves muwhaaaaaaaaa.'

John

'Oh, what's St Patrick's Day without a banshee.

Boardwalk Banshee

The sun sets in the parlor of his Aunt's Victorian on Ocean Boulevard in Seaside Park New Jersey. Shadows reached out to embrace John but tiffany table lights did too. He closed his eyes and could hear the ocean pounding for attention-beyond the dunes. Wind must be coming from the East, John thinks and closes his eyes. When he reopens them, in the mirror, he sees the reflection of a distorted face in the window behind him. John jumps up, twirls around and laughs when he sees it's his girlfriend with a flash light shinning up under her chin.

He opens the door.

John

'Get in.'

Patty laughing

'You turned all kinds of shades of white.'

John

'Thought you were a Leprechaun...don't look at me that way. I've been hanging green shamrock lights and leprechauns all day.'

Patty

'...and Charlie Sheen thinks he knows how to seduce a woman.'
Patty playfully kisses him hello.

Patty

'Anyway...it's breezy and creepy out there.'

John

'Sometimes I like it off season...sometimes the island gets creepy lonely. I'm always afraid someone will come across the bridge to rob the empty mansions and kill any witnesses.'

Patty laughing

'Oh, my God what a thought. I'll protect you Johnny. Rational me was actually worried about banshees and ghosts.'

John

'O.k.

Patty

'No really. Somethoing is crying on the boardwalk. The end with Madam Lillian.'

John

'Madam Lillian is in Florida now.'

Patty

'How do you know.'

John

'In the summer she predicts 'you will meet your true love in the fall...'cause when you don't meet him...she's in Florida.'

Patty

'Well, humor me. Someone, or something muwhaaaa is screeching on the boardwalk.'

Patty grabs John's arm and pulls him onto the porch.They listen as the wind whips in off a moonless ocean.

Patty

'Listen'

John hears a cry...off in the distance towards the skeletal frames of Funtown pier.

Patty

'Let's investigate.'

John

'There's a wierd scream on a deserted boardwalk in a deserted town and you think we should investigate it.'

Patty

'I'm Jonesing for a banshee. Am I the best girlfriend ever.'

John

'Ever'

John goes back inside, grabs his coat, glances behind at the tiffany light shining like a stained glass window through the Irish lace curtains.